What do you want to do?

That's probably the best question anyone can ask me. Thanks Tad. That would be Tad Leckman, Director of Training from Lucasfilm Animation. And though technically I am one of Tad's student, that question wasn't just directed at me. It was asked during his talk at Siggraph Asia 2008 entitled "Finding Your Place in Digital Production".

What do I want to do? Let's see...

I've always been doing what I enjoyed -video games, digital entertainment, work around the world, few worries... the good stuff. But I eventually discovered that I have distanced myself from the "real world", because the "real world" is full of cr*p. To avoid taking cr*p, I had paid for it through solitude and isolation. Recently however, I decided I would leave my comfort zone, come back to my home town and face "reality" in the face.

And the first blow reality dealt me was to shoulder the responsibility of designing, coordinating and generally be held accountable for a whole new course in a field not of my expertise - Visual Effects!

Not being one to back down from a challenge, I accepted it without much thought. Over the years, to the best of my knowledge, I have not had a single disappointed employer. Though my new job is not my favorite cup of tea, I'm going to do my best. After all, I switched job out of my own will.

So what if I don't have a glamorous job anymore. So what if I haven't achieved anything important in life? So what if I don't have any connections, and get treated as nobody. So what if I'm not recognized or appreciated for my efforts?

I want to teach. I want to contribute. I may not fit snugly in an educational institute or a big production house, but I do want to connect with people and make a difference. In my own time, in my own way. I'm starting from the bottom again...

More Siggraph Asia tomorrow. The emerging technologies look interesting.